Summer Rant – Bad Choices

Things are humming along with this summer’s TV specials and series and although Torchwood - Children of Earth will be broadcast this week in North America, I followed the series night by night as it was broadcast in the UK a couple of weeks ago and started off hopeful and intrigued and ended up disappointed and pissed off. I know that the Brits are not known for the Disney formula “Happily ever after”, but the death of Ianto and the departure of Jack for space left a bad taste in my mouth that was flavoured with homophobia and failure. If the BBC didn’t want Torchwood around they would have been better to not produce any more instead of this tripe that completely deconstructed everything and just seemed wrong. I don’t think we will be seeing much more of Torchwood and it’s a shame as it was well written and had some fascinating characters. Another brilliant show that died a terrible death before it’s time.

So you think you can Dance? has already gone to Top Ten and now to the Final 8. Wade Robson is a mad genius and I was in awe at his incredible number that he put together for our Ten. Although I was disappointed that Kupono was nuked this week (but have to agree that he failed miserably at the Paso Doble) and it seems that America is not ready for a kind of androgynous dancer. I don’t see why they can’t have an openly gay competitor (it’s dance, not that it’s new to have a gay man doing it) and maybe soon they will be ready for it. It’s was a shame that Randi was eliminated, but one of the girls had to go and she wasn’t bringing anything different than what the other girls can bring, and she did the same cardinal sin from last year that if you wear a wig and the voting public can’t recognize you, you will be eliminated. I will say that I was pretty shocked that Ade and Melissa were near the bottom of the pack, they both seem to be incredible dancers and look great on camera. I have the feeling that Evan will be packing his bags soon, and even though Jason picked it up this week and did a great number, I am not feeling the love and am getting tired of him mugging for the camera and playing cute. The combination of Mary Murphy and Debbie Allan on the Judging panel is something damn fierce, and Mary’s comment that she is not allowed to touch the contestants must stem from that famous Paula Abdul affair with American Idol. Still, the Cougar level was on High Alert with the boys doing their African number and combined with the Bollywood number with all the girls, brought even more World Dance to the stage. The show is really exposing the public to all genres of dance and that is a very good thing. If we could just do something about Cat’s hit and miss stylist this show would be pretty close to perfection.

The Next Food Network Star just made a major boo boo with the past couple of episodes. Our plucky nutritionist was bumped even thought Jamika failed completely at both of the challenges. I don’t agree that one was kept just because she has a certain resemblance to a certain wife of an President…. I really thought the Judges would have been above that but it appears not. Poor Michael might be great with a crowd but can’t connect to the camera and was destined to be bumped.I still think Debbie is going to win, and has the biggest potential out of the remaining competitors.

The Fashion Show is winding up and the finale was a decent show. I was happy to see Reco bumped after that debacle with the Wedding dress, and it was either him or James-Paul that was destined to be bumped at the end. James-Paul is just too way out there, and I didn’t even get his concept of Aboriginal people wearing western clothing as most tribal clothing is more intricate than his geometric shapes. I liked the multi-purpose idea of his collection, but any piece of clothing that comes with an instruction manual sounds like too much work for me. Daniella’s collection was interesting but too masculine for my taste.I really loved the entire collection put together by Anna and think that she should take home the big prize, she had the most wearable and interesting collection and I really did see her underlying theme flow through the collection.

I have loved the first new episodes of Eureka and it’s nice to see all the gang together and Carter continuing to be the glue that holds all the chaos together. This show and Burn Notice are 2 great examples of well developed concepts and well written shows that stick to the essential elements that make them a success. Of course it doesn’t hurt that both shows have sexy leading men that know how to take charge, have some kick ass women that back them up and some surprises every week. I was in hysterics when Michael’s mom decided to help out with the interrogation and has started to help out in a more tangible way.The chemisty between the characters is as great as ever.

The Superstars is turning into one of my biggest Guilty Pleasures and I keep tuning in to see more of Maksim Chmerkovskiy from Dancing with the Stars compete like a madman and look damn fine doing it. The rest of the teams seem to be on revolving doors with contestants coming and going, and I was applauding our bitchy supermodel Joanna as she had her meltdown when her partner Tyrell quit the competition to go to training camp. The games are fun and quite varied and it will be interesting to see how all of this plays out. It’s fun and light summer fare.

Wrapping things up, I survived a Japanese Game Show is as hilarious and even more fun than last year with all the wacky games and challenges. The whole concept is so foreign in many ways, and the look inside of the Japanese psyche is quite the show. The claws are coming out and the way the teams are dividing and fighting against each other is adding more steam to a high pressure situation and things are getting very hot. In this week’s Elimination round, love birds Jamie and Drew pitted against each other. When I saw the challenge involved deep-throating squid to dismember them, I was pretty sure that Jamie had it in the bag and true to form our girl performed like a champion and won.Unfortunately it meant the end of Drew who was the cutest competitor, but such is the competition. The walk of shame at the end of each episode is always so poignant and ironic as our contestant walk off into the sunset in their final Majide costume. Very funny stuff – in a mean kind of a way.

Weekend Rant – Celebrity Madness

I don’t think that I have had as much fun as I have the past couple of weeks with the disaster know as I’m a Celebrity get me out of here and the 3 nights per week that it has been hitting the airwaves. Although I still have a problem with all of the Challenges involving live animals and insects, the show is so bad that it is good. Janice Dickinson is the best-worst player (I love how she steals from all the other contestants) and has her convenient illness that prevents her from doing the majority of the Challenges. The public seems to love her and want to see her do the wacky stuff, and I have to say that I was in hysterics with the Operation inspired Challenge that got our Celebrities shocked silly (although it appears that Daniel Baldwin has previous experience in this field as he knows beforehand that he can take a lot of juice – I wonder if it was shock therapy or did dude get tasered before?) and it was hilarious to watch Janice get zapped. It’s mean I know but it was damn funny and there were no animals harmed in the process.

I am pleasantly surprised with Sanjaya and his jungle fever, but feel bad for the guy for being treated like Janice’s slave (his words, not mine) and he is being eaten alive by the bugs. It’s hard to say who will last, but he seems better positioned to hang around than some of the others. I was happy that we were down a Baldwin after this week’s elimination, and was laughing my ass off as Janice kept screaming out to Perez Hilton and fighting back against Prop 8 as the Baldwin was eliminated. I know there was no love between the 2 of them and you can tell the a certain supermodel has those narcissistic traits that you come to expect with those model type people. What the producers of this show should do is get Tyra Banks to come out and join the party so we could watch her and Janice try to be the centre of the universe at the same time and watch the time space continuum fold in on it’s self and watch the Universe as we know it be destroyed.

I will say that I really hope that Spencer and Heidi are gone for good after their back and forth appearances on the show. Enough is enough and they should try to get some real stars for this show instead of someone with a tad of notoriety. Seriously. What a bunch of knobs.

  So you think you can Dance? was on fire this week and I really love how the choreographers are pushing the dancers this year. If you don’t like Mary Murphy you will absolutely hate this show but she is the real barometer of how the show is doing and how cute the guys are. Mary talks about her Hot Tamale Train, but the louder she screams means the higher the alert level on the Mary Cougar Scale. I was in literal hysterics when the whole Botox comment went over the airwaves and Mary fessing up to being part of the club (like almost all the women on TV) and watching Adam covering his scream. It was priceless, and this show would not be near as fun sans Mary. I don’t always agree with the Judges but I have a ton of respect for this show.

I thought the choice of the 3 couples in trouble was pretty spot on,but disagree on their choice of who went home as I really felt that Jonathon should have hit the road instead of Tony, but that point is moot as neither of them will make it to Top 10, the competition is fierce this year and Evan is a lot better than I expected… and it’s nice to see fan favourites back like Wade Robson, who pulled out a memorable crash-test dummy number that was as weird and wonderful as a Wade creation is. The man is a twisted genius and I loved all of it from the robot dog to the great performances by Ashley and Kupono. Amazing stuff… I can hardly wait to see Mia put some of the dancers through their paces.

The Next Food Network Star started off this week and you can tell there are a few front runners so far, Eddie may be damn fine but he is way too corporate, I really like Michael but think he may be a tad too flamboyant for the network, and think that Jeffrey is really charming the Judges. Not too be too stereotypical, but our contestants that resemble Michelle Obama and Margaret Cho seem to have a foot in the door (especially Debbie who bombed in the first challenge and there was that whole angel food cake fiasco…) and I don’t think that our nutritionist will be around for long. I hope we have someone interesting win this year, I didn’t really see last year’s winner appear that often after winning and wonder if he really did connect with the viewing public.

Kathy Griffin was back with My Life on the D-List this week and the season opener had Kathy in Vegas with the über fantastic Bette Midler. Things are different this year and Jessica is gone (rumours abound) and Kathy is more in A-List training mode than D-List it appears. There isn’t any real or interesting chemistry between Kathy and Bette (and I wonder how much she got paid to do this) and it feels contrived. If anything else, I really go the impression that Bette is not a big fan of Kathy and I love how she said that Kathy makes her look tame in comparison. Bette used to have quite the reputation for being vulgar and out there. There may be more big stars visiting this season but I think the D-List phase is finishing up for Kathy and she is just going to be know as a trash talking celebrity more than anything else unless she finds a balance. It’s bad when the rising star looses contact with their fan base and roots and is no longer grounded. I think the Emmy wins have gone to her ego …

Reality Round Up - Overlooking Perfection

My favorite ("Squinty" as I like to call her), didn't take home the win last night in this season`s finale of the Next Food Network Star, but I am still really impressed with runner up Lisa Garza and think that she still has a chance to go far in her chosen career.

Lisa is such a perfectionist that she came with 3 complete concepts to the table when it was time to shoot a pilot for the final judging. I sure as hell didn't see the other 2 guys thinking that far ahead, and really think that they went more for personality than content. When she did her pilot promo and emphasized that her sauce was not intended to drown the fish but to accessorize it she had me completely sold. Not only does she know her stuff, but has a great way of getting it across in a fun way that combines fashion and food.. and I don't think you can go wrong with that. Here's hoping that someone wakes up and gives her a show.

I was still surprised that it was "Big Daddy" (Aaron) that won it all as I never really found his food sensibility that interesting and always looked at him as in last place. Adam had better personality and his concept was more interesting, but Judges are Judges and it appears that they know what they are doing, I just don't think that I will watch a show with Aaron hosting it.

Things have almost wrapped up on HGTV's Design Star, and if I hadn't made the commitment to see it through to the end I wouldn't be watching at this point. Matt has talent as a carpenter and designer, but he hasn't "wowed" me in weeks. The other finalist, Jennifer, hasn't impressed me on any level but keeps my attention (I am usually screaming at the TV -- NO! Don't do it!)by continually painting beautiful natural wood furniture glossy white. The competition has been dull to say the least and I would rather watch paint dry. At least we find out who wins next week ... I still feel things are being manipulated by the Judges and that Jennifer got the more likeable family to design for and that will make a difference in voting. I am more excited about seeing the new HGTV Summer Showdown series and seeing some better design work. I have to say that Bravo's Top Design was wayyyy more interesting than this last competition and am looking forward to seeing more of that before another run on this show.

High School Musical - Get in the Picture is in that phase of fishing for talent -- and Disney is so wholesome that I can't handle it and feel like I am drowning in niceness and although I might check it out once we get down to a Top 10 situation, it is more than likely my High School Musical experience will be kept limited to the films.

American Gladiators has continued being a great hit at home, and I love the fact that they have brought back most of the original games and added some great new ones. The pantheon of Gladiators is huge (I can't believe how HUGE the Beast is -- the guy is over 7 feet tall and weighs 310 pounds --yikes!) and I have never seen such a variety of Gladiators. Things are in the semi finals now and the competition is fierce, and the only way it can get better is to bring it back for more. Maybe some celebrity action could be fun too...

The Mole bored me so quick that it vanished off the Watch List in record time and I just realized that it is still on ... here's hoping they don't repeat that mistake again. Did anyone really understand what the competition was?

Reality Round Up - The Top Ten Connection

It is already pretty obvious that I am a reality show junkie (my "guilty pleasures" as I like to call them) but I am still selective about which shows I will watch ... and quite often it's the process of getting from the beginning of the show (the auditions of some kind) to the meaty part of the competition (the "thinning the herd") can leave something to be desired. American Idol is probably the best example of this, and because of their need to showcase all the freaks & geeks to the world (in a pretty exploitative manner) that I am really not interested and I get turned off by some shows. Idol did it's self in with me a couple of years ago, and between the inane judging (Paula) and the popularity contest quotient of the competition I just couldn't stand to watch anymore and see real talent be voted off while dimwits went through ... anyways .. that is a rant for another time.

Dance competitions have a different element to them, and I have followed a fair number of them, but have really found that So you think you can Dance? is the benchmark show for the genre. The routines are astounding, the choreographers are mad geniuses, and the competitors are all young, talented and beautiful. What more can you really want?

We finally got past that mid step part of the show, the infamous "thinning the herd", and are now down to the Top Ten who will compete for this year's title. The rounds have been great, but this is the time that I really start cheering for my faves and getting all fired up. I was a little disappointed with the last elimination, as I was pretty sure that Comfort was to stay and Jessica was to hit the road (especially after Mia was so blunt about it the previous night) but Jessica stayed and my dear Comfort was dismissed.

Not for long -- as it was in the news that Comfort was back and Jessica was off due to an injury. I can't say that I feel too bad .. I did really want to see Comfort go further and see how much more she could blossom, she has been really incredible and has such potential. I still think the Judges are being too kind with Will and am eager to see how things develop over the next episodes, the competition will be hot - hot - hot this time around. I just hope we get to see more work by Wade Robson this season.

Last Comic Standing is finally out of the auditions and semi finals and into the competition part. For me, this is when it gets to the best part and you see the comedians put into different zany challenges to prove how funny they are.This year's international selection is a real mix with a couple of Brits, a Canadian (who I thought already had a successful career...), a hysterical guy from India (yes, even comedy is getting out-sourced now) and a whole herd of Americans. This week's challenge with the boxing ring rounds and the Yo' Mama and Hack jokes were too funny, and God's Pottery had me in convulsions with their ability to stay continually in character. I am getting to the point that I wonder if those 2 are for real or what? Too gosh darn funny. God's Pottery rocks!

It's nice and creepy (and gotta love that Thriller music!) that the elimination part of the series is done in the cemetery this time around, and some of the finalists are too wild. Yeah baby sometimes u kill and sometimes u die as a comedian, but you would think that none of them ever watched this show before? How could they not know that their Smack down Confessional was going to be seen by the others? Puhleese ...

We get down to elimination time, and it's the annoying Esther who is put up for elimination, and she chooses God's Pottery and Elisa to compete against in the head to head round. The crappy part of this week is that 2 comedians will be eliminated, and so after this week we lost Esther (most irritating laugh ever) and my favourites, God's Pottery. Here's hoping that God's Pottery(Gideon Lamb and Jeremiah Smallchild) find some other gigs soon, their parody was hilarious and very original. They should be proud that they were the first duo selected for the competition. Elisa rocked in her performance, and certainly deserves to be there. I blame this all on Esther, who chose her competitors. Now we are into the Top Ten and next week they have guest judge Carrot Top to deal with. Yikes!

Project Runway is back this week with the Fifth season. I can hardly wait, it is way up on my list of must see Reality Shows and I am looking forward to seeing what kind of brilliantly twisted characters and challenges they will have this time around. The fact that it is paired up with Shear Genius on the same night, and opposite So you think you can Dance? has me worried. My Wednesday nights are going to finishing late... too much good TV on the same night. Why do all the really good show have to play Wednesday and Thursday night?

I am terrified to watch the new Disney creation starting this Sunday (High School Musical - Get in the Picture) because I think I might get sucked in to the competition too easily. I have enjoyed the films, and if the competition has even the slightest taste of " Show Business Moms & Dads" to it, it will be a done deal and I will not be able to miss an episode. It's not like it will really affect my Sunday night shows as HGTV Design Star and Next Food Network Star have been pretty boring so far.... I am not sure if there are any half decent designers ( Matt seems to be the only one with a real chance to win) and the contestants on Food have been pretty lackluster to date. My choice is still Squinty ( Lisa) to win.... but Adam has shown the most personality so far and has a chance of sneaking in under the radar. Neither competition has me glued to the tube so that is probably not a good sign. At least the competitions are almost over....