Summer Rant – Finishing up the season with Dance Fever

I can hardly believe that Summer is almost over, and the beginning of September heralds cooler weather and the launch of the Fall season. The majority of shows are starting in mid to late September, but even this upcoming week gives a taste of what is to come and wraps up some of the summer fare. This is the last official Summer Rant for this year… time flies!

So you think you can Dance Canada? is following the same formula as last year, one 2 hour night of competition followed the night after with a 30 minute result show. I still find the Result show too rushed, and really, really ,really (get the point?) hate the whole “Fake out” routine that the writers insist be used to inform the dancers whether or not they will be continuing on the show. The show still has that warm and fuzzy polite Canadian feel to it, and the competition is even fiercer than last year.

I did agree with their choice of guy to boot, Taylor, as he had a terrible solo (his other dancing was fine), but was shocked that Tatiana was let go. I really thought she had the right vibe to go far and she is a phenomenal dancer. I don’t always understand the Judges.

Speaking of Judges…. I think it is great that they are sticking with an all Canadian Panel (and even in the selection process this year there was more Canadian content than last year) but Jean-Marc is just completely pissing me off. The guy is too loud and I cringe each time he draws attention to the Choreographers. A tad over the top, pas si fort SVP. I still don’t know Trey well enough to give an educated opinion on her dance qualifications, but she seems to be more ego than substance so far.

The performances have been incredible, and the majority of numbers are very intense and well done. My favourite was the Afro-Jazz routine created by Choreographer Sean Cheesman and performed by Jayme Rae and Daniel. They are a phenomenal couple and both being from Montréal makes them the home town kids and front runners for the title.The Contemporary routine with Cody and Melanie M was amazing, and I am really enjoying anything choreographed by Stacey Tooky. She is getting a incredible reputation on both sides of the border and it’s well earned. Both of these couples got all of my votes and I was hitting redial for both of them for quite a few votes each.

I really didn’t care for the Disco routine because it had no real Disco music. Without the right sound it just did not seem to be a real disco number and it was a real flop. Bad choice there by choreographer Melissa Williams as it was not good for Jenna Lynn and Nicolas. I was surprised as I usually like Melissa’s numbers. I saw that the vampire was back again, and Paul Becker looks even more vampire than last season. His number with Tatiana & Austin was very physical and intense and it is beyond me why Tatiana got eliminated. All in all it was a great first week of the competition and the performances will only get better.

This upcoming week the American version will be showcasing the Best of So you think you can Dance as a warm up to their new season starting in a couple of weeks. It will be a tad confusing to have both versions running at the same time (albeit at different rhythms) but it makes for a lot of great dance. Add America’s Best Dance Crew on to the list and top it off with Dancing with the Stars makes for a ton of dance on TV. It makes me a busy, but happy couch potato. So on the subject of America’s Best Dance Crew, I just loved the Martial Arts Challenge and how each crew had to include a style with in their number. I am really happy how Vogue Revolution is hanging in and actually getting some good feedback from the Judges who are now more interested in this innovative gay group who herald from New York's "Vogue" house/ballroom scene. This is the first dance competition show on TV that has really embraced gay groups and it is about time! The competition has been great so far, and crews like We are Heroes are keeping me glued to the set and some incredible numbers. I was sad to see Southern Movement have to leave, but one crew gets cut each week and unfortunately they got the short end of the stick.

I am slightly ashamed to admit that I have a new Guilty Pleasure and have been catching up on Dance your ass off, which has been surprising and shocking me with every episode. I am still a few episodes behind, but more than half way through and sucked into watching the next episode as I have to see what they will do next. There seems to be enough positive messages that try to compensate for the exploitation components of the competition, and I am always really surprised with the performances. I do question the taste level and the actual competences of the Judges (who the hell are those people?), but if this show can get people off their ass and get them moving then it is a good thing. I just can’t get over how surprising agile some of the competitors are, it’s really unexpected and has actually broken down some of my personal stereotypes of obese people. I am pretty sure almost all of the male dance partners/choreographers are gay (yes I know another stereotype but who usually dances with fat girls?) and I am surprised that not all of the competitors are losing several pounds per week with all their dancing and training. We haven’t seen much of the Cheat Cupboard and our contestants having a meltdown and eating a box of donuts.

In other reality fare, the return of Project Runway has been a huge success at home and it’s so nice to have the gang back. The show may be on another network and in a new city, but it has all the essential elements and the right feel. This is the original and the best show of it’s genre and I am so happy that it is back. The challenge this week, to create chic Maternity wear for Rebecca Romijn (married to Jerry O'Connell), pushed a few of our designers way out of their comfort zone. Some of our designers went a bit more literal, and our androgynous Malvin went off the deep end with his chicken and egg inspiration. The Judges are not dealing well with crazy this time around so that sealed his fate and he was aufed in no time. Congrats to Shirin for her stunning design, but I was a tad concerned when I saw that it was *gasp* all gay boys up for elimination and all straight girls with the best designs. Those gay boys better start bringing their A game or thinking of a new career as a stylist. Snap.

Models of the Runway is the perfect companion piece to Runway and I am digging the behind the scenes look at those skinny models and the bitchy competition between them to get paired up with the winning designer. I am not surprised that there may be a few obsessive compulsive personality types mixed into the gang, and that some of the girls may be a tad slower as they have always relied on their beauty to get ahead in life…. but Fatma is just too whack and a tad bit obsessed with designer Logan. This is borderline stalker territory and a bit too obsessive for my taste.

Top Chef Vegas is a great competition so far, but I was a tad surprised of all the drama surrounding one of our lesbian contestants, Ashley, who was not in favour of doing a challenge that involved marriage as she is denied that right in her country , the so called “Land of the free”. I have to agree with her and think that it is just stupid, gay marriage has been legal in parts of Canada for years and hasn’t led to the end of society. I think I was more shocked that the top was brought up on Top Chef, which usually has a kind of macho/cowboy sensibility most of the time. It’s still early in the competition but I am seeing a few of the chefs stand out including Jennifer, who seems to be hitting a lot of the right notes with the Judges, and it is very interesting that the brothers Bryan and Michael seem to be frontrunners, and I can’t help but cheer more for the bad boy of the two, Michael, and his gung ho attitude and forward thinking cuisine. Course there is something to say for bad boy tattooed chefs, they have a certain sexy swagger to them.

Summer Rant – Transition Time

Things are still running along at a furious pace this summer, and this week heralded the endings of a few favourites, yet harkens the beginning and return of other favourites. It’s a win win situation.

So you think you can Dance? finished off this round with Jeanine winning the big title in a surprise that was both pleasing and upsetting. I was all about Brandon winning, but was happy that it was another dancer that I respected and felt did a dynamite job this season. Jeanine’s title will be short-lived, with the next round starting this Fall, but she truly deserved to win and is now the second girl to do it. I was a tad surprised that we didn’t get a performance out of Sabrina (our other female champion) during the best performances recaps, but maybe our girl is busy doing other projects. It’s a shame their tour doesn’t swing by Montréal, but I am pretty sure that we will see the dancers performing elsewhere or be returning guests on this show. It was a fabulous season and the show manages to get better and better.

I love the small dancing appearance by our Judges, but felt a tad cheated after last year’s knock out numbers with the gang. I do have to say that Cat really did a great job of hosting and keeping things going smoothly, and wardrobe issues aside she is really good. Wade’s number this time around was probably the one that I have liked the least by him, it might have been the subject matter as I love him more when he is wild and out there. Mia is always a gem and deserved all the kudos that are laid on her. I think the biggest surprises this season on the choreograph side of things, was Tyce coming into more of his own thing and being hilarious as a Judge, and how many of the Louis Van Amstel numbers were loved by the Judges. Let’s just hope that Paula Abdul is not picked up as a Judge, Idol must be happy they are done with her and all her wacky crap. I can hardly wait until next month and more dance!

Of course, next week heralds the beginning of So you think you can Dance Canada? and I will be a happy camper being able to vote and see all the local talent. It looks like Mary Murphy will be around a fair amount and it’s nice to see her flexing her vocal muscles above the 49th parallel. I am even willing to travel to Toronto to see the show live and have applied for tickets this round to see if I can see more of the live action, and would love to see the Judges and dancers do their thing live, I am sure there is tons of stuff that never makes it on air or past the censors.

Rounding out the dance stuff on TV, Randy Jackson presents America’s Best Dance Crew (ABDC) dished out their Top Ten Performances special before the new season launches this Sunday. While I loved seeing all the great crews again, I hated the lay out of the show and the continual reminders that the show is now at a NEW TIME and a NEW NIGHT that were relentless and down right aggressive after the umpteenth time. Randy, you have to chill dog, and I don’t think it was just a coincidence that the Number One on your countdown was featuring one of your late brother’s hits. Let’s just hope that there is no tacky exploitation of Michael’s demise on the show as that would be in very, very poor taste, and downright disgusting it being family and all. Even with the complaints, my appetite is ready for more Dance Crew and some more of the best group numbers that can be seen on TV.

This past week had even more Finales, including the well deserved win of Kristi Leskinen & Maksim Chmerkovskiy and their kick ass performance in the last part of the Superstars. Our winning team was always near the front of the pack and won half of the competitions, and had never been to the Elimination round before the last game.The competition was fun and a nice summer diversion, and it was a pleasant surprise to see how athletic and competitive Maks is. I hope it comes back again, and that they can add more challenges and have a more interesting and complex obstacle course. It’s not American Gladiators or Battle of the Network Stars but a step in the right direction.

I survived a Japanese Game Show finished up this season and I was happy to see our soccer mom and oldest competitor Cathy kick ass, take names and win it all. The challenges in the 2 hour finale were just insane, and the Super-Majide obstacle course at the end was all the best of the worse. I think anyone who underestimated our ladies was in for a rude surprise as they ended up pitting the guys against each other, eliminating the biggest physical threat (Brent) and then disposing of wimpy and whiny Justin. Well played and another fascinating look into Japanese popular culture and their undying need to humiliate and subjugate the competitors. I thought it was hilarious how they got the guys all done up like big fat Americans and made them play their humiliating Wet T-shirt game to spell out the winning phrase, but was riddled with dangerous floods of water, foam, seaweed and other things that fell in torrents from the ceiling. The games were not always the cleanest, but if you were willing to try and win it was worth it for all the cool prizes and even for some of the punishments. That last one with the Zen masters looked fascinating and I loved how Zen Megan was after her so-called punishment. It didn’t get her to the very end, but she had a great time doing it and seeing things that some of us will never be able to do.

The Next Food Network Star was crowned this week, and I was a tad surprised that it was our slightly harried and hyperactive housewife, Melissa d'Arabian who managed to get it all together and impress some big critics and the Judges to win the big prize. Jeffrey was good, but I felt cheated by his choice of ingredient, and that simple sandwich that he put together.Melissa was way more creative and gave some good advice for the potential audience. I think the marketing people will have some fun with Melissa, and while I wish it was Debbie that was there instead, there is something satisfying about seeing an untrained home cook beat out of some more experienced and creative chefs. This round was better than last season, and if I get the chance, I will check out Ten Dollar Dinners if it plays on Food Network Canada, unfortunately things are not always the same as the American network and I have a hell of a time finding some of the shows. I have not been able to find HGTV’s Design Star (it may play one day here in the Great White North) and have given up for now.

Kathy Griffin and her Life on the D List did redeem herself with her Norma Gay episode, and while her attempt is applauded, I am not that into this season and find the disdain of her apparent friends (acquaintances) more pitiful than funny. Things wrap up next week and I am more interested in seeing vicious Kathy hosting the Joan River’s Roast on Comedy Central this Sunday than anything else. It will be scathing evening and worth the potty language. Joan was hilarious this week in the premiere of How’d you get so Rich? and her matter of fact WTF? questions with her quest for average guys and gals who have struck it rich is hilarious. I love how she interacts with the camera and her apparent love of the F word as an expletive for almost anything is very endearing. The stories are astounding at times and Joan is so hilarious in her reactions to how some of these people got so rich. This show is a must see and I can hardly wait until the next episode.

Summer Rant – High Performance

Since things are in “Summer mode” here at Couch Potato Central, the scheduling has gone to ranting about the tube once per week (hey it’s Canada here and you try to enjoy those few weeks of hot weather per year) and has led to the birth of the Summer Rant. It’s a catchy name that pays homage to the heat and crazy summer programming and more sporadic postings.

When we get around to the Top Ten on So you think you can Dance? I will probably be inspired to throw my rant amongst all the others on who should stay and who should go but I will say that I am very impressed with the quality of dance this time around, and although it will be a short lived title, this round’s favourite dancer will have paid their dues to make it to the end. I was really happy to see that Brandon was finally getting some love from Mia Michaels on the judging panel. I was not shocked with this week’s dismissal of Vitolio and Karla as they were the weakest of the herd, and I was thrilled that Kupuno is starting to get more of the love that he deserves. It’s a tight race for the guys as they are all pretty strong but there is something about Ade that makes me think he is a strong contender for the crown. Jason and Phillip need to step up their game, they are next on the block and might be dancing for their lives more often than they like. I think they all learned the lesson this week that you if you need to bring it then you better really bring it, dancing for your life is not a snappy title it’s the reality of the situation.

On the girl’s side, Cat was better dressed than the monstrosity she was wearing last week, and I am in absolute awe of the incredible lines that Melissa is pulling out, her Ballet piece was phenomenal and was another ground breaking performance for this show. I love how it is bring all sorts of styles of dance back to TV, and the quality of the new professionals that are getting involved in the show. The girls are all performing their hearts out and aside from a lacklustre solo, I really think that Caitlan and Janette are really going for it and have shown a ton of potential so far.The whole Dizzy Feet Foundation is a great idea (and I love how it highlights that incestuous relationship with Dancing with the Stars and includes that wacky Paula Abdul) and that upcoming guest appearance of Katie Holmes better deliver more than a brainwashed baby momma. Time will tell. Damn I love this show.

I have been having a blast watching The Superstars and seeing one of my favourite Dancers from Dancing with the Stars, Maksim Chmerkovskiy, running around shirtless and doing damn well in a pretty tough athletic competition. There seem to be a ton of big egos with all those biceps and it’s fun to watch all the celebrities strut their stuff à la Battle of the Network Stars ( that series really, really needs to be redone properly) with a tad of American Gladiators thrown in and musical teams as participants keeping getting eliminated due to injury. They are all suffering these injustices at the scenic Paradise Island Resort in the Bahamas. It’s a tough job but someone has to do it.

WipeOut is even crueller than last year and we have been in hysterics watching (and rolling on the floor) with the scathing commentary by the 2 Johns. Hilarious. I love the new challenges and am kicking myself that I didn’t apply for the home grown version. Between this show and I survived a Japanese Game Show, there is a ton of ridiculous situations and hilarious costumes that always make me question the Japanese sense of humour and their need to humiliate the competitors in games that probably shouldn’t even be considered let alone attempted. Talk about extreme risks in some of these challenges, I am surprised that we haven’t seen someone take a nasty spill that they can’t get up from yet.

My Expedition Africa experience is not turning out how I really wanted, and the series is starting to get on my nerves. I don’t understand most of the drama on the show (and it seems like a waste of time),and for a gang of so called experienced explorers, they are starting to look more and more like knobs each episodes. I would love to know what their Porters are saying about them behind their backs and how ridiculous that they look most of the time. It’s a shame, I thought it would be more of a chance to see the country and it’s people and it is more about the drama – sigh…. I expected more…

On that note… The Fashion Show is wrapping up (there are some miracles…) and it has been a major snore fest. I can’t wrap my head around their real fashion for unreal people concept and the end results. It was time for our magical little Honduran elf to say adios, and I have the feeling that our geeky Asian guy is not far behind. I thing the psychic was the best part of the episode and if they decide to do a second season, skip to her right away and decide the winner before putting me through another season of Not-Beyonce and Isaac. I am looking forward to new Project Runway and some real drama and fashion!

On the comedy side of the coin .. the last few episodes of Better of Ted have been hilarious and I love the satire of working for a big company (Veridian Dynamics) and the way the characters deal with the questionable ethics and the überboss Veronica has had me in hysterics every episode. Her deadpan presentation is hysterical and I love the way she dismisses people, it is one of the funniest scripted things that I have seen recently. It’s a shame that Samantha Who? is burning off the remaining episodes as it is very funny and the characters well developed.I still hold out hope that it will be rescued but this year has been rough on losing well written shows.

This week will be a ton of fun with Torchwood – Children of Earth playing over 5 nights on BBC One (and will be shared online if the gods of the internet are feeling generous) and I am looking forward to getting back in touch with Captain Jack and gang. It’s a great week for Sci-Fi with  the beginning of Warehouse 13 and the return of EUReKA, one of my favourite shows. Vive l' été!